He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person