the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
i need some magic done to my vagina
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
