I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
