So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Randomize
