There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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