Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
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Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
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He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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