kristin has been a bad kristin
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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