so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
