Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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