she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
