How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
