new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Randomize
