What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
my shit smells like andre
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Randomize
