What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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