"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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