Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
