I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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