I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
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