Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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