saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. you can't hotbox the world.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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