she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
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You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
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