Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
