You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Someone came in the potted fern
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
