The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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