hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I am spending my child support on dildos
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
