I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Randomize