the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
