Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
