I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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