Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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