I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
it's like iHOP with fire
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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