i jhust puked up my retainher.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize