OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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