That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize