That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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