You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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