we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Randomize
