omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
