P.S. I can't hear my feet
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
