New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize
