its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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