You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
