I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
