Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Randomize