do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
