she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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