i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Randomize
