this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
