i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
