4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
