What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
