You're my little dorito
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
